Another New Chapter

It has been too long since I last posted. About 20 weeks to be approximate. So much has changed since the last post. Four days later I went back into the hospital for another non stress test. My blood pressure was up and protein was showing up in my system so they decided to keep me over night only to then decide that it was too risky to wait any longer. After breakfast the next  morning I was told that they would start prepping me for c-section surgery that afternoon. Then they moved it up a tad only to move it back a few hours due to a couple in labor moms coming in. Finally at 8 pm that night I was on my way into surgery. I got a spinal shot which numbed me from about the waist down. Like the shots they use for dental work only your legs instead of your mouth are numb. That was an odd feeling but I'm glad I didn't have to feel what they had to do. After all the prepping and cutting at 8:49 pm we heard MariaBella yelling on her way out to be followed by Stella at 8:50 pm. They were 17 1/2" 4lbs 8oz and 17" 4 lbs 6oz respectfully.

MariaBella and Stella

So at 35 weeks and 5 days we welcomed our little girls. However due to them being on the smaller side and not having much fat on their bones it was harder for them to keep their body temperature up. It didn't help that my room was much colder than the nursery so after an afternoon with me their temps were down and had to go in the warmers. Also Stella was breathing on the fast side so it was IVs for her for a few days. They ended up needing to be monitored and stayed in the incubators most of the time for several days. I wasn't released myself until the Wed following due to my blood pressure not coming down fast enough. I knew most of that was the stress of the girls not being perfect and wanting all of us home. The hospital however let me stay in my room so I could be by the girls all the time. So every three hours they got fed. MariaBella was doing well and was soon off of feeding tubes that were needed to make sure they got enough food. Especially since my milk wasn't coming in at first and they were tired all the time so it was hard for them to stay away to eat. By the time the weekend was near both girls were off the tubes, monitors and out of the incubators. On Sunday we were all able to go home and what a difference that made, they were eating better  by that evening. 2 days later when we went to the Dr for their first check up they were already weighing in at more than their hospital weight; which of course was less than their birth weight due to normal loss. However, since they were small at birth every oz counts so it was a big deal that MariaBella was only 4lb 2oz and Stella 3lbs 15oz when we left for home. 
Within 2 weeks both girls were improving greatly and nursing well, Stella was doing the best and the most interested. Every visit to the Dr is encouraging to see that she is happy with their continuing progress and steady climb up the growth chart. They were only hitting in the 5%-10% range but with them being small at birth due to being twins and early, she said they are still doing well. We shall see tomorrow how they have done the last 2 months when we go back in for check ups and more shots. 
The vaccines started 2 months ago and I was worried that they wouldn't handle the shots too well. Mostly thinking that Stella would have a hard time with them since she seems to be more like me and little things can quickly become big things. Both did well and now we face the shots again tomorrow. 

Stella

I know they are both close to 12 lbs now. Stella had to go 2 weeks ago to get meds to fight the Thrush she had in her mouth and she weighted 10lbs 13 oz, 22 3/4" then. I'm curious at home much they both have grown but especially Stella. Looking back over pictures from birth and the month after I can't get over how skinny and small they are. 
Now we round the corner on 20 weeks and I'm so happy to see them growing and it gives me an excuse to rotate their clothes as well as going shopping. Their legs are so long that they grow out of somethings before the rest of them does.
Its hard to believe that its been over a year since we first got pregnant and less than a year until their First birthday. Time does go by fast as they say even though it would seem that it shouldn't since I'm at home with the girls 98% of the time. I do get out on occasion to run errands or grocery shop or even on the rare occasion to hang with a friend, 
And to add to all this newness and excitement not only do we nurse both of them (not tandem any more) but we cloth diaper as well. That has made things interesting at times but I like that it is healthier and all around more natural for the girls.
People ask how we are getting along and what its like raising twins. To be honest I don't know what its like to only have one baby. I have nothing to compare it to. Oh, and I'm getting sleep, the girls started sleeping at lest 5 hours a night at 3 months old. Granted there are times that one or both wakes up early morning or in the night but most nights they sleep closer to 8 hrs or more. Now if only I could get my self back into the habit of to bed by 10 or 11 like when I was pregnant. The following is a picture of the two taken just 2 days ago. 

MariaBella (left) and Stella (right)

MariaBella

Sooner rather than Later?!

Our appointments with the doctor are once a week now and she wants us to go to the Birth Center at the hospital to be monitored twice a week. We found out last week after a test that I have a mild case of preeclampsia, thus the extra monitoring. Sunday when we were done with another session of the monitoring we talked with our doctor when told us that she thinks the girls will defiantly be born in less than 3 weeks. Which is before their due date. A piece of good news that she told us at our appt last week is that twins mature faster than singletons and when something such as the preeclampsia adds a little stress to them they take it as the green light to speed it up so they can be born sooner but still safe. Today we officially hit the 35 week mark at which point the girls are able to be born locally rather than the hospital about an hour away.
We've come a long way in the last year, Sat the 9th  marked the year anniversary of our miscarriage and here we are soon to be holding twins. God does work in mysterious ways.
I'm about half ready to have the girls. It is easier to take care of them right now but my belly is now measuring 45 cm, gets in the way and is feeling heavy. Besides who wouldn't be ready to hold the girls. We see the doctor again tomorrow then another ultrasound on Wed. We're really looking forward to seeing how big they've gotten and how they sit. Hoping that Baby A has moved head down rather than breech.
Going to try to keep up to date....

Full Circle

I'm slacking for sure after seeing that I haven't posted since Sept 2010. We found out mid December 2010 that we are expecting again. Things were rolling along good with doctor's appointments and I had only a couple weeks of morning sickness. Then at 20 weeks we had our first ultrasound and with it a surprise: we are pregnant with twin girls!!

Now we are at the 33 week point, the girls are weighing in at 3lb 7oz and 3lb 13oz as of June 21st which was our latest ultrasound. The doctor told us that twins are considered full term at 38 weeks. That gives us a due date of Aug 1st. However, today she suspects that they may be here sooner; we are looking at anytime after July 11th.
So much has happened in the last 8 months that I should have been blogging the whole time. The surprise of 2 instead of 1 baby, the anxiety of early contractions and hours of observation last month, the sobering news that c-section may be a must and is scheduled and now knowing that Baby A is laying breech and Baby B is bigger may seal the deal of needing a c-section. Which to me is disappointing though I know it may be necessary for the health of the girls.
The whole family is excited to see the girls, especially one of my sister-in-laws who finally gets to be an aunt via one of her own siblings. As for names, we each get to pick one, however the hubby isn't telling the one he has picked until she is born. Only that it will be a variation on one of his grandmas' names and start with an "M". Since I like things in alphabetical order, that baby will be first. So right now we have "M" and "Stella Eileen" for the names. Stella being simple, short, easy to say and hear. Eileen was my Grandma's name and I know she would be in her element welcoming the girls if she was still with us.

Our parents have generously taken care of the big things such as cribs, dresser, high chairs, car seats, etc. plus the start of a growing collection of cute clothes. The hubby has been working to get the nursery ready especially since they may be born as soon as 2 weeks from now. Its hard to believe that we are so close to finally holding these two precious bundles and sobering that we are so close to really becoming parents. And with twins we are grateful to have so many family and friends waiting in line to help out.

Round 2

Once again we are trying to conceive a baby... its the waiting that is frustrating. We did have an appointment with our now OBGYN which went well. I was encouraged to hear that from my history we are in great shape to conceive again and not to worry about another possible miscarriage. Only this time not to tell the world until 8wks and a heartbeat. I've found out more about miscarriage since mine. Such as 1 in 5 woman have them; a lot of woman don't even know that they are pregnant yet when it happens; a lot of the woman that I know have experienced one. Its the not knowing why that drives me crazy, that is when I try to remind myself that it was my body and God doing what was best for us at this time.
So the waiting begins.... again.

Long Time... No Posts

So sorry that I haven't posted lately. I really haven't wanted to post the events that followed just 5 days after my last posting. Unfortunately I miscarried on July 9th so we are back to being at the TTC stage. Positive side is at least we know we can get pregnant now and if it had to happen at least it happened only 5 wks in rather than later. It has taken time and still continues to at times be a struggle for me to deal with. I have found out that many woman go through this, some of them are friends and family that you didn't even know had experienced it. A part of me looks for the "why" and "was it my fault?" but things happen and this was my body being healthy and saying "Something is not right.... something is quite wrong..."
Also on the positive side is this opens the opportunity for myself and one of my long time friends to possibly be pregnant together as they are TTC as well. The 2 of us are only 5 weeks apart in our own births how fun it would be to have babies together.
It was once again at this junction in our lives that FB became a bittersweet network. On one hand people were able to easily share their love and concern without me getting emotional face to face with them. On the other hand I got to see friends that are still blessed in childbearing; which brings us back to the "why?" question. Don't get me wrong I'm happy for them but why me? There is a bigger picture I know, I just wish I could see the forest and the trees at the same time.
Other than that life is still the same here. BJ was in the process of switching it a different shift when one of he coworkers quit therefore leaving him at his current shift which of course doesn't work well for a newly married couple and I of course don't take it well most of the time. I like to be able to interact with my husband on a daily basis not just on his days off. Again... part of a bigger picture. At least he has a good job, getting good hours with benefits.
Not really anything else to share at this point but now that I have shared the sorrow I feel I can possibly get back into posting so that any followers can stay updated on everything.... especially when we have any great announcements since we are still TTC.

Not much going on here

ok so not much to post right now seeing as not much is happening baby wise... at least not evident to me yet...
right now i'm checking out new shows on Hulu.com
The Middle is fuuuunnnnny. The mom is played by the same mom that was on Everyone Loves Raymond.


AAAAA summer celebration is going on this week and it is turning into a pain for me. We have to take different route back and forth to BJ's work or get stuck in MAJOR traffic. That may sound like a stupid complaint but I usually drive on automatic pilot so that means I have to stop and think about every turn I take. Ugh! only a couple more days and that part of life goes back to normal. we're planning on going down to the art and craft fair to walk around and look. I told BJ that it would get me out of the house and walking besides I plan to my self an elephant ear. Summer is the only time you can get them due to that's the only time of year that the booths are open. Tis the season in West Michigan... that and Pronto Pups in Grand Haven. Been there, ate them with my long time friend Jenny.


Just remembered a new change due to the baby... going to the restroom twice as much. which for me is different. I use to tease my mom about how whenever we went on road trips she would start out drinking coffee. then what seemed like less than 2 hrs down the road she would have to stop at a rest stop. Then at meal time she would drink pop or water maybe coffee and again would have to stop... not to mention she would go there when at the meal stop too. meanwhile dad and i would ride hours with out even the need....
well the curse works, you know the curse that mom's put on their children that when the kids become parents they will experience the same things the original parents did.... its kicking in already. all the years of teasing, well i'm becoming my mother. no that's not a bad thing just different. I'm WAY more emotional than i use to be. no old yeller doesn't make me cry but all dogs go to heaven does. and now guess what i have to pee a lot.

Chapter ?: The New Beginning

After much mental debate I decided that this new chapter needs a blog. A way for me to communicate with myself and possibly others what we are going through and what is happening. Not to mention my opportunity to actually speak out about what I think.

What has deemed this point in our lives as a new chapter? Four days ago we took an important test and the results were relief, excitement, and shock. Four days ago we found out that we are pregnant. This was something that we (myself especially) had hoped for but we're in the dark as to how soon or long it would take to come about.

So please bear with me as I explore this new fronter of blogging the days, weeks and months ahead as this new chapter unfolds.

Now that I have prefaced this a little I want to jump right in. I started doing a little online research this morning since sleep was escaping me. I stumbled or rather clicked across an informative website concerning the week by week development of the baby. My best guesstimation is we are entering week 5 which would be the 3rd week since conception.

I was amazed to see that the first heart beat could be by the end of next week. NEXT WEEK?! The miracle of it all! And after looking ahead a few more weeks (wk 8)I was completely shocked to see in a picture that the form of the new little one could be visible. So soon! Again, the miracle of it all! Now at this point it would be wise and safe for me to point out that twins run in both our families though I know that the decision is from my man's side. Hmmmm twins. We'll cross that bridge if and when we come to it.

Now that we know we are expecting I'm going to have to step up my preparations even more. The other bedroom which was going to be the game room painted in San Jose Shark colors will now be the baby room; though I'm thinking of still playing with the same colors only different hues. That means I have to get organized. Actually this may make it easier... I'm sure there are a lot of things in those boxes that I won't want to bother with keeping now that we are making way for a baby.

Yes, we have been thinking of baby names... I've had a few picked out for years but have made alterations due to wanting to bring in some family names from his side as well. He is a Jr. so I decided that a son would need to bear the name too; however we plan to use it as a middle name so as to prevent possible confusion or teasing. As for a girl I'm thinking of using the middle name of my name sake. I was given her first name but my middle name was inevitable: after 4 boys I was the only girl so what else could it be but Joy. At least that is what my mom has always told me. LOL